Monday, May 28, 2007

New Beginning

Hmm....So, i'm out of High School and officially and i graduate on Wednesday...I'm excited but i gotta admit i'm pretty scared. I mean, i've never actually been on my own before to make my own decisions. I hate to say it, but my dad has always been there to bail me out of tight spots but now its all on me. I mean, i'm sure i'll be okay, but i don't want that. I want to be more than just okay. I guess it's just the perfectionist in me comeing out but i don't want to mediocre. I don't want to be "average". I want to maintain the lifestyle i'm living now but that's basically impossible on a college student budget, and i'm not a gambler so that's out :). I guess that's what im really scared about; failure, poverty, change.... I really don't like change, i'm not good at stepping out of my comfort zone, ask anyuone who really knows me. Luckily, Fresno State has weekly on Campus Bible Studies, so hopefully my faith will calm my nerves quite a bit.
I'm also going to miss so much. I mean, i dont love Bakersfield but i have had some pretty good memories here and there are a lot of great people that i've grown close to in the past year. I'm going to miss Journey like no other, just the High School gatherings have been a blast and have definitely helped me to have much stronger faith in God. I will also miss DIVE like no other. I truly feel blessed that the Champions have opened their home to a group of High Schoolers to help us in our Journey with God. I have definitely learned a lot from them, from our group talks. Of course, i will definitely miss the long prayer seesions. :) It's like group therapy and prayer all in one, we've had a lot of great talks and i think all of use have grown closer because of it.
It's like, in moving to Fresno, i'm starting fresh, again....Kind of scary but kind of cool all at the same time. I've had so many fond memories in this crazy place and i will miss them all....
And, no, if your reading this, i didn't forget about you Matt. You have my heart and so my heart will rest in Bakersfield for as long as you live here. I love you and i will miss you so incredibly much. No worries, i'll be home on weekends and as often as i can. I love you, don't forget that when i'm gone.

No comments: