Thursday, April 3, 2008

Sons of Snakes

Lately I've been feeling "un-Godly". Kind of the only word really that i can use to describe it at this moment. Basically, what I mean by "un-Godly" is simply that I have not been living my life as a Christian, follower of God, like I should be doing. I am human, but I know that I can do so much better than I am doing right now. I am definitely letting life get to me. I'm letting people in general get to me. My temper (you know that lovely thing that gets you in a whole bunch of trouble) has honestly been a little out of control. I've been cursing more, yelling more, arguing more, but, mostly, I've been hurting so much more. Life hasn't been anything like I thought it would be, and I'm realizing that it's going to be much different than I ever thought. But, this rough patch, I guess is just something that I have to deal with, and I should really keep reminding myself to deal with it in a more peaceful manner. Screaming and cursing and fighting is not going to get me through this but God is. I was watching Brad Stine the other day (and amazingly funny Christian comedian) and something actually impacted me. I've been reading a lot more lately about Jesus' life in the book of Luke and I have learned so much more about the relationship Jesus had with the Pharisees. Brad Stine talked about this a little bit and how Jesus even once called the Pharisees Sons of Snakes (in layman's terms obviously). Now, this in no way justifies anything that I have done, but this really conveyed to me that Jesus was indeed human as well and as a human he had emotions and opinions, and everything else that humans have. In that moment, when he called the Pharisees sons of snakes (something very bad in those days) he was showing his human side and showing me that I'm not always going to be "Godly" but I have an obligation to still love the people who oppose me and try to hurt me. Pretty cool moment actually. Basically, what I'm trying to say is, it's okay to let my human side show. It's okay to be angry, to be hurt, to argue every now and then but I always need to remember that God has complete control and, no matter what, I am His child and I must love those around me. I may act wrong at times but little things like that keep me in check.

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