Monday, April 28, 2008

Peace

These last few weeks have been quite crazy and I know some of you are waiting for an update. Well, a positive one at least. I can't say everything is perfect and back to normal like i wish i could but that just isn't the case. However, i can say that things don't seem to be as difficult and painful as they were. Steve and I are working things out and the outlook is good. I'm amazed out how much we have been through in our time together and, quite honestly, at this point i feel that we can make it through just about anything. With that said, a lot of things still need to be changed. The ex needs to stop calling and texting, something that she said she would do but that she has failed at so far. Also, trust needs to be re-established because i'm tired of asking the same questions over and over but, for my heart's sake, it needs to be done. Thirdly, we need to get the hell out of Fresno. Steve will hopefully be able to ;eave work sometime shortly and we both will be able to have a relationship together. Until then, things are kind of rocky and they will be because he has lost all my trust up here in this town. I am confident though that we will finally get to the point when i am able to breathe and rest, assured that these days and these trials are over. Until then, continued prayer for my health and my relationship with Steve would be greatly appreciated.
Sorry, i'm going to kind of go off topic here but something just popped into my mind. I was talking to my good friend Adrienne on the phone the other day and we've both been having a hard time lately. She said that sometimes things just need to get worse before they get better. In some ways, that statement really does seem true. I pretty much hit rock bottom Saturday night. Sometimes that is what happens. After all, when you hit rock bottom, there is nowhere else to go but up. After that, things seem to be doing better. Like i said earlier, not perfect, but better. I just pray that I can stay healthy and strong and that I can salvage what I can of my classes this semester. Things sure aren't easy but God really has given my heart peace.

1 comment:

Natalie said...

it's amazing, that word. Peace. It was the theme of small group this week, and it was pretty awesome. We're looking at fruits of the spirit and peace was the first. We looked at the passage of the stoning of Stephen, and how even through the midst of everything he had this overwhelming peace. Now, i know you arent dying, but i think it's amazing that you've been able to rely on God and he has given you this spiritual gift. It's kind of funny the things that are from God that we sometimes take for granted. like faith, and yes peace. but when you need it He is ready to give it to you.
Keep hanging in there, I know that you'll make it through this. And know that I'm praying for you. I just thought you should know that I think you're a pretty inspiring person. :-)