Ugh

So, it's been two-weeks since the whole situation with Steve happened. I figured it would be a good time to write about what's going on. Or, well, write about some of it I suppose.
Steve and I have been talking (roll your eyes all you want). No, nothing is going on. Wedding plans aren't back on, and they never will be. We are only talking, as friends, and even that can be rocky. This past year has been difficult and honestly, i sort of have a pessimistic view about the upcoming months. Maybe I'm just being moody but I am certainly not happy with where I am right now. To be honest, it sucks. I know I don't really have the right to say that seeing as I have it pretty good compared to most people in the world but I can't help but feel like i'm on edge. It's rediculous actually. I feel kind of like a loonie. What I mean is, I feel like I'm at my wit's end. I'm short with people, I can't sleep more than a few hours a night, and I can't be decisive about anything. I'd like to move, but that's not realistic. I just don't like where things are heading. No offense to anyone (i don't know why anyone would take offense) but I don't like being back home. I'm angry that I will be here for at least one semester and I'm even angrier about going to BC. I really don't want to go. So far, my experience with BC has been pure and utter bullshit and I do not look forward to starting in the fall. I'd like to take a year off to figure stuff but that isn't an option either. I feel stuck. I feel angry actually, which is kind of odd because I'm not really an angry person at all. Ugh.